If I Forget - Re-written
by VintageNicky
Summary: When something is too painful...too overwhelming...we deny it. If it didn't happen, it cant hurt us. Right? - Full summary inside. Hermione and Sirius.
1. AN Blurb!

**This story has already been part written, but I felt it needed a re-write and wanted it to be a completely fresh story. I am sticking with the same basic ideas and there will be chapters in this story that are barely changed from the first, but there are some subtle changes - mainly dates, but also some quite major plot changes. I hope people enjoy this as much as they did before. Let me know if you want to add anything, I'll credit people will ideas if I include them :) **

Blurb.

When something is too painful...too overwhelming...we deny it. If it didn't happen, it can't hurt us. Right?

At 21, Hermione Granger has been through more than enough pain in her short life. She has survived Dementors. She was tortured by Death Eaters and actually fought Voldemort himself.

But nothing could ever hurt her as much as this.

How can she ever get over the death of her family?

It should have been her. She had been the one that put them in danger every day, just by fighting alongside her friends. The Death Eaters were after her. She should have died that day.

She killer her family.

Running away feels like her only option, but what about the memories? She can't run away from those. Or can she?

Now she has to fight something that has always been there for her. Her own memory.

Can she get past this final hurdle and take control of her life?

And what has the notorious Sirius Black got to do with it all?


	2. The Situation

_May 16th 2000_

Smoke filled the small car, waking Hermione with a jolt. She panicked, trying to open the door but her fingers slipped off the handle. Holding up her hand, she could see the glistening red blood that was dripping slowly off her fingers.

She panicked again, trying to work out where it was coming from. It made her head spin. The logical part of her brain - and, she guessed, her survival instinct - kicked in before she passed out from the smoke. She lifted her left hand, which she noticed had started throbbing rather painfully when she moved it, and pushed down on the steering wheel.

The horn sounded loudly. And again. Her head felt heavy. She tried to push it again, and keep her eyes open, but she couldn't. Her head dropped forward onto the wheel, her body slumping forward as she sunk quickly into unconsciousness.

_July 16th 1980_

Sirius had just finished 'adjusting' the old house when he heard the crash. Scowl fixed firmly in place, he marched outside to confront whoever was trying to desecrate his new home.

Half-way down the drive, he noticed a small car that had indeed knocked down most of the front wall. As he got closer, a nasty sense of unease passed over him. Something just didn't feel right. He ran the rest of the way, desperately trying to work out what the bad feeling was.

The horn sounded three times, very loudly, which was a slight comfort to Sirius. Whoever was in the car had to be alive to press the horn three separate times, right?

'Who is in the car?' A voice most definitely not his own whispered through his mind.

All thoughts of the wall disappeared as he made his way round to the driver's side door. Pulling on the handle, he pulled it open.

Smoke billowed out of the door, so thickly that for a moment Sirius was unable to do anything but cough. As the smoke began to clear a messy thatch of long curly brown hair became visible. It covered the steering wheel so Sirius could only assume that the person belonging to the curls had passed out. Definitely not good.

Quickly taking out his wand, he performed a spell to check that they had no serious injuries, and it was safe to move them. He reached into the car and tugged at the seatbelt. It didn't move. He tugged it again, trying not to injure the person further. Still no movement. He took out his wand again and used another spell to cut through the offending piece of fabric, which now hung limply by the side of the unconscious person.

He carefully removed the person from the car, moved a safe distance away, and gently lowered them to the floor, slowly, so he didn't cause any further damage.

The messy thatch of curls enveloped the face of the person, with blood covering most of it, dripping slowly onto the ground.

_February 23rd 1995_

'The second task is tomorrow.' Was all that circled though my mind as I flipped through _Weird Wizrding Dilemma's_ for the third time. "Oh this is no use." I said, slamming the book shut and reaching for another. "Who wants to make their nose hairs grow into ringlets?"

"I wouldn't mind." Said Fred, appearing rom behind a bookshelf. "Be a talking point, wouldn't it?" George emerged from behind Fred,smiling and nodding his head to show that he compltely agreed with his brother, as always.

"What are you two doing here?" Asked Ron, looking slightly bemused by his brothers presence. They never usually came into the library, unless it was to cause mischief, and they really didnt need that right now.

"Looking for you." Said George. "McGonagall wants to see you Ron. And you Hermione."

I tried thinking of reasons she may need us both. Had it just been Ron, it would have been missing/copied homework related, but I had no work to be given in, and certainly no copied work.

"Why?" I asked, still unable to think of the answer myself. I didnt want to leave Harry alone, we still hadn't worked out how he would do the second task and he looked like he needed our help still.

Fred shrugged. "Dunno..." He said, flicking Ron' ear absentmindedly. "She was looking a bit grim though."

"We're supposed to take you down to her office." Said George, trying to swipe the book that Ron had been reading, and succeeding as Ron was no longer paying attention to the book. He was staring at me, almost willing me to work it out. I turned to look at Harry, Ron' eyes bulging as he followed.

Had McGonagall noticed how much we had been helping Harry, when he ought to be working out how to do the task on his own?

"We'll meet you back in the common room." I told Harry as I stood to leave with Ron. "Bring as many of these books as you can, ok?"

We left the library, with Harry looking rather pale as we departed. Maybe McGonagall wanted to tell us how to help him? Highly unlikely, but she had always surprised us in the past. I was still debating with myself the likelihood of this thought, when we turned towards the large oak door that lead to McGonagalls office. We knocked once, and waited for a reply.

"Enter." McGonagall's voice echoed through the door. Ron gulped, looking a little pale himself. He pushed the door open slowly, trying to delay whatever was about to happen.

"Miss Granger, Mr Weasley. Please take a seat." The Professor spoke fluidly from behind her seat. Fred was right, she did look grim.

"Professor, we're well aware of the rules regarding the Tournament, but as I'm sure you'll agree, Harry being picked while he is still young is rather an odd event, so we just thought that he might benefit from some help and we didnt mean to break the rules we just don't want to see him get hurt or..." My babble was cut short as she held up her hand and gestured for us to sit.

"Miss Granger, although you are correct, that is not why you are here." She stated which completely threw me. Now I had no idea what was going on, and I didnt like it.

"Why are we here then?" Ron asked his voice slightly higher than normal.

"I have no doubt that Harry has shared with you the riddle within the egg?"

"Yeah, that song thing, from the mere-people in the lake he said." Muttered Ron, still unsure what was going on.

McGonagall looked straight at me. "Do you remember the song, Miss Granger?" She asked.

"Well, yes. Are we in trouble, Professor? Should he not have told us?"

"Recite the song, Hermione." She said, looking down at the desk, staring intently at her wand.

Confused, I did as I was asked.

"Come seek us where our voices sound,  
We cannot sing above the ground,  
And while you're searching, ponder this:  
We've taken what you'll sorely miss,  
An hour long you'll have to look,  
And to recover what we took,  
But past an hour - the prospect's black,  
Too late, it's gone, it won't come back."

I stopped just as she opened her eyes again. As she stared at me, I said something that rarely passed my lips. "I don't understand." And it was true. What did the riddle mean? And why was Professor McGonagall looking so worried?

"The second task requires extra students to be involved."

I gasped, suddenly realising what she meant. "Professor, you can't!"

Ron squeaked beside me. "What?"

"It's us Ron. The Mere-people want to take us, so Harry has to find us. We are what he'll 'sorely miss'."

"You are half right Miss Granger. Mr Potter must find Mr Weasley, but it is Mr Krum' task to find you."

"Krum?" Ron barked.

"You can't do this, what if they don't find us?" I continued, choosing to ignore the girlish side of my brain that wanted to squeal about being sorely missed by Victor Krum. "They say after an hour we won't come back. Surely Dumbledore wouldn't allow it?"

"I'm sorry Miss Granger, but Professor Dumbledore insisted the task be taken seriously. I can assure you, you won't be harmed." She raised her wand and whispered a spell that I didn't recognise. I started feeling sleepy. My head felt heavy on my shoulders.

"Professor, please stop." I pleaded, but she had already turned away from us. I felt myself slip down in my chair, my head dropping to the side onto my shoulder and I surrendered myself to sleep.

_July 16th 1980_

"Come on love, wake up."

I heard a voice whispering to me, but I didnt recognise the person. It was a male voice, that much I could tell. But it was deeper than Ron' or Harry', so it couldn't be them. It didn't sound like any of the teachers either.

"You need to open your eyes."

I still couldn't tell who it was. And I couldn't seem to do what he was asking. I tried, I really did, but my eyes did just not want to obey me.

My head started to ache, and I have the strongest urge to cough. 'It must be the water from the lake.' I thought, suddenly wondering who had won the task? 'He obviously found me on time. I'm still alive, aren't I?'

I opened my eyes just as my body heaved forward, and I felt as though I was coughing up a lung. My mouth was dry, my eyes were stinging and my skin felt like it was on fire. 'This can't be right.' I thought fleetingly as I leaned forward to cough again.

Strong arms wrapped around me, lifting me so my upper body rested back against something solid.

"That's it, let it all out." The voice rumbled behind me. He starts patting my back as I cough again.

'I'm not a baby!' My mind shouts. 'I can cough without assistance, thank you very much!'

I try to turn around and tell this person what I had just been thinking, but I moved too quickly. Pain shoots through my entire body. I recoil back against him, and promptly throw up all over myself.

Nice.

"Ok, we should get you inside and clean you up." He says behind me. "Can you walk?" He slides out from behind me, and tries to slowly pull me up to stand in front of him. My legs feel like jelly, and with a whimper I fall back to the ground. "I'll take that as a no."

My head feels funny again. I turn to look at him as he wraps my arms around his neck, but my eyes are behaving badly again, and they drop shut before I can see who it is. He lifts me bridal style and starts walking. My head falls against his shoulder, and my eyes open again. I look behind us, expecting to see the lake or at least Hogwarts grounds.

We're walking away from a smoking car, down a long driveway, in the middle of the countryside.

'What the hell?' This has got to be some weird dream.

Pain shoots through me again as he manoeuvres me through a door. "Sorry." He mumbles as he kicks the door shut, jarring me again.

'I thought you couldn't feel pain in your dreams?'

He places me on a large sofa, and I sink into the comforting softness of the cushions that surround me.

I hear clattering behind me, and what sounds like a cupboard opening and closing, then more clattering coming closer. He sits in front of me, holding two small bottles. One has a shimmering red liquid inside; the other is a dull green. He takes the lids off both and hands me the green one first.

"Here, this will help." I hold out a shaking hand to take it from him, and sniff the contents. It smells foul, and I try to push it away but he gives it back. "Trust me you'll be thanking me later. Just drink it."

I take it back reluctantly and swallow the contents quickly. I'm still recovering from the taste when he hands me the red one. I don't hesitate, the warm red liquid passing my lips quickly. He takes both bottles off me and stands up, leaving the room. My head stops aching, so does my chest and the rest of my body. I sit up slowly, pushing my hair back from my face. I stop suddenly, feeling something wet over my forehead. I pull my hand away, looking at the blood on my fingertips.

Just then, the man enters again with a bowl of water, a pack of cotton balls and a wad of bandages. I'm still staring at my hand, transfixed by the coating of blood.

He wipes my hand clean then moves to lift my head, his hand gentle under my chin, as he tilts my head to examine the wound.

I'm looking straight at him, not wanting to believe what I'm seeing. Sure, I've seen the pictures enough around Diagon Alley, but somehow he looked different.

There was no mistaking who he was. Sirius Black; notorious mass murderer and escapee from Azkaban. Lily and James Potter' killer.

A scream passes my lips and I jump away from him. "Get away from me!" I shouted, looking around for my wand which I usually kept with me at all times.

"Calm down, I need to check that cut." He reaches for me but I slap his hand away and climb over the back of the sofa.

"Stay away from me." My voice sounds stronger than I'm feeling right now. I step back as he moves towards me. "Stay back!" He doesn't stop. I look around for something, anything to protect me, but there's nothing.

"Hermione, will you please just sit down. I need to clean that cut."

"How the hell do you know my name?" I step back again, bumping straight into the wall.

He stops and stares at me, a bemused look on his face. "You're drivers licence fell out of the car."

I stare at him blankly, not really listening as I look out of the corner of my eye at the door. 'If I run, could I get out before he gets to me?'

"Just let me clean that cut and then we'll figure out what to do with you. I think I know someone who can help."

He steps towards me again but I jump away from him, running as quick as I can towards the door. I pull it open, and run back out onto the drive.

"Hermione, stop." He's shouting after me, but I don't, why would I?

"Leave me alone!" I shout back, still running towards the large black gates. As I approach them, they slam shut. I try to climb up them to get over and I scream as he wraps his arms around my waist, pulling my back down.

He whispers something that's sounds familiar, and I feel myself falling quickly into unconsciousness.


	3. Forget It All

**Mostly this is just chapters 3 and 4 (or 2 and 3 if you don't include the Blurb chapter) of the original story, but I have made quite a few changes too so its probably best to read it even if you've already read the old version. I hope it makes sense; it did to me, but I was half asleep when I made most of the changes so it could be rubbish. **

**As always, if you recognize it, I don't own it. **

**Enjoy :) VN x**

* * *

Waking up, I look around me, expecting to be back inside the house. I was met with the familiar surroundings of Dumbledore's office, with Fawkes looking down at me from her post.

It was just a dream.

I sat up slowly, noticing the dull ache in my head and looking for Dumbledore himself. The room was quiet. Except for Fawkes and myself, there was no one else present. It seemed off that I would have been brought back here after the task, would it not have been better for me to go back to the dorm?, or the hospital wing if something had gone wrong?

Or maybe something was wrong with Harry, or Ron. Had they not made it back on time?

I started to panic, wanting to find out sooner rather than later if something had gone wrong.

I started making my way across the room to the staircase. I was about to give the password when I noticed something not quite right. I walked over to the mirror I had seen out of the corner of my eye.

The mirror itself was indeed new, I had never seen it in the office before, but it wasn't the mirror that had caught my attention. It was the reflection.

The girl in the mirror wasn't me, or so it seemed at first glance. As I looked closer, I noticed the similarities between myself and the reflection; the same brown eyes, skin tone and the small star shaped birthmark below my left ear that no one ever noticed. But beyond that, there were so many differences too. The scar below my left eye, that wasn't mine. And the one on my lip, that had never been there before.

I was still examining the face in the mirror, convinced there had to be a spell placed on it, when Dumbledore entered. But even he looked different. His hair looked shorter and darker, and there were significantly fewer wrinkles on his face than the last time I had seen him. Was it just the light in the room? But then that didn't explain me looking different too.

There must be some mistake. Clearly the lake water had affected me in some way, or maybe I'd bumped my head. Or maybe, the mirror was enchanted. That reflection could not be …

"Yes, it is." Dumbledore spoke, looking towards me. "Many of the things you see around you are charmed. That mirror, however, it not. That is your reflection."

"Professor, what's going on?"

"I believe the answer may lie in your pocket, Hermione."

I glanced down and saw a small bump in my jacket pocket. I put my hadn't inside and took out what appeared to be a short chain necklace, with a small loop swinging loosely as I held the necklace in my fingers. I looked up at the headmaster, still not understanding what he meant.

"And the rest." Was all he said.

I felt inside my pocket again. Out came two silver cone shaped pieces, and another smaller loop. My hand felt strange too, gritty. I felt again. Yes, it definitely felt like sand.

"What you hold in your hand, is the Time Turner. If my sources are correct, I believe you were given this particular Time Turner at the start of your third year. Or should I say, you will be given this particular Time Turner at the start of your third year.

I looked curiously at the broken pieces in my hand. I had read about Time Turners, and knew that you had to be very careful when using them. This definitely couldn't be mine; I would have taken far more care not to break it. "There must be some mistake professor. I don't remember receiving this at all last year."

"There is no mistake, and it was not last year that you received it." Before I could say anything, Dumbledore held up a hand to stop me. "I can assure you Hermione it has been a while since you were a student here, and yet it has been no time at all. It is a very strange turn of events that brought you here, very strange indeed." He walked slowly across the room and sat behind his desk, gesturing for me to sit in one of the vacant chairs in front of him. "Tell me Hermione, what is your last memory before you woke here."

I tried to concentrate, but all I could think about was the strange dream. But what if it hadn't been a dream?

I closed my eyes, like I always did when remembering things, emerging myself in the fuzzy memory trying to make sense of it all.

_I saw a big white house, with paint crumbling off the walls and windows thick with dirt. The garden looked overgrown, and there were weeds growing around the edges near the wall. I turned and looked at another part of the wall, or where the wall should have been. In its place was a small red car, looking pretty beaten up with smoke billowing out from under the bonnet._

_'Hermione, stop!'_

_I turned around just in time to see myself running out of the door, someone following close behind._

I gasped and opened my eyes wide, grabbing hold off the desk to steady myself. "Sirius Black!" I tried to calm my breathing, noticed the very audible quiver in my voice. "It was after the second task. I woke up and I wasn't here, I was outside this house I had never seen before, and he was there. He kidnapped me!"

As I spoke, I heard the statue move at the entrance to the office. I turned, curious to see who it was, my eyes widening as he walked in the room.

"What is he doing here? Professor' I..."

"He brought you to me, after your accident. He believed I was the best person to find out what has happened to you." Dumbledore replied, flicking his wand to bring another chair closer.

"But..." I stopped, not knowing what else to say, it was all too confusing. 'What accident?' "Why would he bring me here?" I tried again. "And why would he stay?" I glared at the raven haired wizard who had taken the seat close to me.

"Sirius is brave, clever, and energetic. Such men are not usually content to sit at home while they believe other to be in danger."

"He's the reason I was in danger!" I was practically screaming now. There was an escaped convict sitting next to me, and yet Dumbledore didn't seem to care.

Silence seemed to echo around the room as I glared at each man before me.

"The situation has been explained to me and I believe there are bigger issues at hand." Dumbledore broke the silence, taking hold of the broken necklace I had placed on the desk. "Terrible things happen to those who meddle with time, Hermione. Terrible things. I don't know the extent of it, but I believe your Time Turner breaking was somehow the cause of your accident."

"It wasn't broken when I took it off her." Sirius interrupted.

Dumbledore paused, looking first at Sirius then back to me with a curious expression on his wizened face.

"When I took her out of the car, I took the necklace off her. It was hot, and I didnt want it to burn her skin. As soon as it was off it became colder. I didnt have anywhere to keep it, and I thought it might be important to her, so I put it in her pocket."

"This is far greater magic than we thought." Dumbledore mused, more to himself I thought. Then he looked directly at me and continued. "Time Turners hold great power, Hermione. More so than people believe, such power that we don't fully understand how they work. What we do know, is that along with the power to transport the user back or forward in time, it also holds an ancient magic, which is linked directly to the witch or wizard who holds it."

"I already know this Professor, I read about it last year. What has this got to do with me?"

"Your Time Turner not only transported you back to the present time, but curiously it seems it has also wiped your memory. Only you will be able to understand the events that cause the time jump, and you will regain your memories in time." He must have seen the look of confusion on my face, and continued. "Hermione, you do not belong in this time."

It took me a minute to fully grasp what had been said. I don't belong in this time? How ridiculous; Dumbledore must be going mad. There was no possible way that he could be telling the truth.

I glanced at the broken Time Turner, a question forming in my mind. "Professor, if you don't mind me asking, what is the date?" My heart raced at the thought of traveling through time without memory of it.

"May 16th 1980. A Tuesday; rather a favourite of mine actually."

The pain in my head was starting to come back in full force, throbbing just by my left temple. This had to be a joke; a really bad, simply not funny joke! Why wouldn't they let me simply return to my dorm to sleep? Surely I had been through enough today?

"I'm afraid you will not be returning to a dorm Miss Granger. There are, as ever, some complications that apply with any time travel. I cannot allow you to be around the students; when your memories return, there may be certain details of students or teachers here that would put yourself and others in danger. Also, and I am guessing here but my guesses are normally correct, I believe you are older than the students here. It would create a lot of unnecessary interest in how and why you came to be here; until we know more details of your circumstances, it is my opinion that you should have as little interaction with other people as possible.

He actually believed all of this? At once, I thought of returning home, but somehow sensed that Dumbledore would say no to that too.

"So it seems we have a dilemma. We can't keep you here, and we certainly can't send you out to fend for yourself when you are certainly not yourself."

Sirius, who had been twiddling his thumbs and starting intently at his knees throughout Dumbledore' speech, suddenly spoke up. "She can stay with me."

All eyes turned to the raven haired wizard. I wanted to say something, to argue against it, but my throat felt dry and scratchy, and the words wouldn't come.

When no one spoke, Sirius continued quickly. "It would make the most sense I think. You can keep an eye on her there Professor, and I was planning on going into hiding anyway because of…" He stopped, glancing at my briefly before looking back to Dumbledore. "Because of that thing we have previously discussed."

"No!" The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them. "No, professors please, this is all wrong."

"I don't see anything wrong with that solution, Hermione." Dumbledore finally spoke up. "I can assure you that Sirius will take good care of you."

I felt anger start to bubble up within me. Normally, I wasn't a nasty person, but there was no way I was agreeing to this. I had to let my views be known in this situation. "Are we talking about the same man? The Sirius Black I know is a wanted murderer. He not only killed 12 innocent Muggle', but also betrayed his best friend, my best friends parents, to Lord Voldemort. If it weren't for him, James and Lily would still be alive. You can't seriously expect me to trust him with my life too?"

Again silence rang around the room. Sirius was looking at me with a wide eyed expression, fear etched across his face. For some reason I felt a stab of unease; something wasn't right about my statement, but I couldn't understand what. I tried to think of how I knew this, various scenes coming to my mind but just as I thought I was on to something, it slipped away and the headache returned.

Sirius seemed to regain his voice, though it was a lot softer and shakier than I had heard it before. "I…I don't…What?" He paused, running both hands over his face and through his long hair. He looked back up at me and I noticed the faint glimmer of tears in his eyes, barely there, but just noticeable. "I don't understand. I would never betray them, they trust me. Why would I give them up?" He paused again before straightening up and looking straight at Dumbledore. "I want to change the plan. I…I need to change it."

Dumbledore looked quizzically from me to Sirius. "I don't think…"

"Peter! Make Peter the secret keeper, no one will suspect him, they'll expect it to be me."

A wave of anger and nausea that I couldn't explain suddenly washed over me. "No! You can't, not him!" Both men turned to look at me. "I don't know what it is Professor, but I have this feeling. You can't trust Peter; he…" I couldn't continue; the feeling was there but the memory was fuzzy, a few glimpses of a large black dog, a disgusting looking rat and a werewolf flashed across my mind, but nothing that would explain anything. I didn't even know what the 'secret' was, but I knew deep in my heart that it would not be kept if Peter had anything to do with it. "I don't know why. But you can't." I finished lamely, feeling myself sag as my head throbbed.

For a moment they seemed to be lost in thought. Sirius dropped his head into his hands with a loud sigh.

Once again, Dumbledore broke the silence. "I think Sirius, that for now it would be better to continue with the original plan. You are hidden well enough to protect the secret, and I will provide any protection necessary for your houseguest."

They continued speaking as if I wasn't there, discussing spells and enchantments that sounded both familiar and obscure. Another fuzzy memory surfaced, though again the visual was lost. I heard someone - who sounded an awful lot like me – casting each spell that they were mentioning. Had I really performed that kind of magic?

When I re-emerged into the conversation, both men were silently staring at me. Sirius looked thoughtful for a moment before leaning towards me. I wanted to move away, but something inside me told me to stay exactly as I was. "I don't expect you to trust me right now Hermione. I know that there are a few things that you don't understand at the moment, but there is no other way. We need to keep you safe while we work out what has happened to you."

"Nothing has happened to me." As the words passed my lips I knew they were a lie.

This was all getting too much.

"I'm afraid there is no more time to discuss the matter; The Potters are on their way here now with Harry to discuss the rest of the plan. I will inform them of this latest development." My stomach lurched again at the mention of Harry and I willed back tears that were trying to force their way out. What the hell was wrong with me? "Miss Granger I will check on you by the end of the week, hopefully with some more news about the situation. Now, if you will excuse me. Sirius, old friend, take care." And with that he ushered both me and Sirius to the fireplace. My whole body felt numb but I couldn't stop myself from following Sirius a he took a handful of floo powder and stepped into the grate. Hesitantly, he reached for my hand. As my fingers entwined within his I looked up to see him staring straight at me.

Somewhere in the back of my mind I registered that we were no longer in Dumbledore' office; we were now travelling past many different grates within the wizard world. I had never liked traveling by floo, and just as I felt my head start to spin Sirius tightened his grip on my hand.

"Hermione, it's ok. Trust me."

And the strange thing was, I did.

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**Sooo? What do you think? **

**Reviews help me write so keep them coming, if you have any ideas you want to add let me know, if I use any I'll give people credit :) **


	4. Remember when

**So again, its pretty much the same chapter as before with a few changes added, I should be getting onto the real new stuff in the next few chapters :)**

**Disclaimer: if you recognize it, I don't own it :( It belongs to J.K.**

* * *

When we finally arrived back at the house, Sirius stepped out of the grate before me. My hand dropped lamely back to my side, and I tried not to think about the sudden feelings of comfort and familiarity I had felt with his hand in mine. I step out of the grate and start to brush soot off my clothes.

"I guess I should show you to your room." Sirius mumbles, running a hand through his untidy black hair before gesturing for me to follow him. I do, trailing up two flights of stairs and down a long hallway to a room right at the end, facing out to the front of the house.

It was a fairly big room, with a beautiful canopy bed in the middle that I was pretty sure I would need a step-ladder to get onto. There was a large wardrobe in the corner, a comfy looking window seat in the bay window and, most noticeable because of its size, a bookshelf that stretched across the whole of one wall.

"I noticed you have a lot of books in the car and thought you would prefer this room." Sirius says from behind me, but I'm not really listening.

After thinking of how many books I can fit on the shelves, my attention is drawn to the window. I walk over quickly and sit down, looking out across the garden. The car in the wall had stopped smoking by now but was still half stuck in the wall, and one look at the surrounding countryside made my stomach drop. There were no houses nearby, or any other signs of civilisation.

_'Fantastic,' _I thought, _'I'm in the middle of nowhere, with a murderer, and no wand; just brilliant!'_

"Hermione?" I turn back to look at Sirius still stood in the doorway. Leaning casually against the frame, he holds up a bag that looks familiar. "This fall out of the car when I got you out." He crosses the room slowly and places it on the bed before retreating back to the door. He looks unsure of what to do, and for a moment I have the strongest urge to laugh; Sirius Black does not pull off that look. He opens his mouth as if to say something, but then closes it and nods slightly, pulling the door shut as he leaves the room. I stay sitting on the window seat, listening to his footsteps as they thump back down the stairs.

I wait until the footsteps fade, before getting up and making my way over to the bed to pick up the bag. I turn it over in my hands, feeling the smooth leather and the roughness of the engraving on the front.

_J.G._ Jean Granger.

I turn it over in my hands, feeling the smooth leather and the roughness of the engraving on the front. I remember when my Dad bought this bag, as a birthday gift for my Mum when I was 6. She took it everywhere with her, and I was always storing things in the small front pockets whenever we went out, pennies usually but sometimes small toys too.

I feel my chest start to tighten and my eyes prickle with unshed tears. Quickly, I empty each pocket and the main section of the bag, and slip it under the bed. I take a deep breath and try to calm my racing heart, though why it is racing I have no idea, but right now it makes my head hurt trying to work it out, all these feeling are so confusing without the memories to go with them.

The contents of the bag are even more confusing. There was my wand - which I never normally carried in a bag, it was usually in my pocket – a few tissues, some muggle money and some wizard money too, and an assortment of Chudley Cannon items scattered through the pile. It was the quidditch items that really confused me; I had been to a few games with Harry and Ron, but I had never bought any of the merchandise.

I pick up one of the items - a small cannon that stood about an inch high on my palm - and examined it. There didn't seem to be anything special about it, but as I held it, I felt the metal heat up. Quickly dropping it, not wanting to burn my hand, it fired a small orange ball which flew straight across the room and landed with a surprisingly large 'bang' on the bookshelf. I laughed, a proper full out loud laugh, thinking how ridiculous it was that such a small thing could make such a large noise. Retrieving the ball – which took a while, it was rather small after all – I returned it to the cannon quickly hoping it wouldn't set it off again, and placed it on top of the bookshelf, where I hoped it wouldn't do much damage.

Before I could examine more of the curious objects, there was a knock at the door and Sirius popped his head around the door. "Would you like to eat now, or get your stuff out of your car first?"

"I, uh…" I mumbled brilliantly, trying to un-jumble the thoughts running through my head. "My stuff? Out of my car?"

Sirius looked puzzled, "Yes; your stuff, our of your car." He paused, looking at me intently for a moment. Then he pushed the door open and crossed the room, pointing out of the window as he spoke, a hint of a smile playing on his lips. "That tiny little thing that knocked down half my front wall."

I crossed the room to stand beside him, looking down at the car. "That's mine?"

"Yes that's yours, who else would it belong to?"

"I thought it was yours."

"I prefer my bike." Sirius smirks and nods towards a small garden shed peeking out from the side of the house. Behind the shed sat a huge black motorbike that looked a little dirty and neglected.

"You ride that?"

The smirk was suddenly gone, and he seemed rather hurt that I thought so little of the bike. "Well, I haven't been able to ride it in a while." He said simply, before turning to walk back out of the room. When he reached the door he turned back to face me. "So, food or stuff?"

I checked my watch, noticing that it was 6 o'clock, but it felt much later. My stomach rumbled, giving me a loud reminder that I hadn't eaten anything today, and I smiled sheepishly. "Food."

* * *

It took longer than I expected to collect some of the stuff from the car. We left the numerous boxes of books that filled the backseat but took in everything else. When we finally managed to get it all up to my room, Sirius excused himself, leaving me to unpack and explore the house and garden. He had already told me over dinner which rooms I wasn't allowed to go in – his room obviously, the attic, his Mothers room and his Mother's old greenhouse – but told me with a smirk that I could have unlimited access to the large library at the heart of the house. After seeing how many books were in there, I was quite happy to stay in there for a few hours perusing the shelves to see what sorts of books were kept there.

When I finally returned to my room it was nearly 11 o'clock and I was starting to feel tired. I hunted through several of the bags of clothes we had brought in, trying to find something to sleep in. At the bottom of one of the bags I found a pair of loose tracksuit bottoms and an oversized Chudley Cannons t-shirt that I didn't know I had, and changed into them. I started hunting again, looking for my toothbrush and finding a bag of makeup I didn't know I owned, along with many items of clothing I had never worn before. When had I bought these? Why didn't I remember?

_'That might be because you've lost your memory…'_ My mind taunted, sounding like an annoying child.

I climbed into bed – no step-ladder needed – thinking that I would never be able to get to sleep with all the thoughts spinning through my head. But as soon as I settled comfortably beneath the warm woollen covers, I found myself dropping off into a fitful sleep.

* * *

Sirius sat silently in his study, and poured himself another glass of fire whiskey. He was looking through the photo album that held pictures of him and his friends. It was mostly pictures of James and Lily, and some of Remus too, although he didn't really like being in the photos and preferred to be the one taking them. There were even a few of Harry.

Most of them were magical; showing James sat on a fair ride for Harry' first Christmas, and Lily pushing him on a swing. There were a few Muggle photos mixed in, upon Lily' request, although it took Sirius quite some time to learn how to use the camera.

Sirius remembered those days clearly, smiling to himself at the happy times they had shared together.

The last picture in the book was taken a week before James and Lily had been taken into hiding. They had taken Harry to the Zoo and watched as he babbled to himself as he pointed towards the animals. He got covered in ice cream, and even managed to wipe some all over Lily' face as he gave her a sloppy baby kiss.

The picture was of Lily and Harry. Harry was smiling up into the camera, his eyes shut as he laughed at James pulling faces behind Remus. Lily was looking at Harry, and apart from when she had married James, Sirius had never seen her look so happy. She places a kiss on Harry' cheek, and whispers 'Mama loves you Harry.'

Sirius closes his eyes, and once again prays that their plan will work, and that the three of them will stay safe. He downs the fire whiskey before pouring out the last of the bottle. Before he can drink it, the fire in front of him starts to glow a vibrant green, and a body steps through the flames into the room.

"Remus!" Sirius exclaims, crossing the room to embrace his friend. "What brings you here?"

"Dumbledore sent me. He told me about your houseguest." Remus looks up towards the bedroom where Hermione is sleeping, and shakes his head. "He told me what happened, but I couldn't believe it. What is going on?"

Sirius returns to his seat, pulling up a chair for Remus and summoning a glass and a fresh bottle of fire whiskey from the shelf. "Honestly, I have no idea." He takes a mouthful of fire whiskey and tries to work out how to explain the day properly. "I was just finishing getting rid of some of the furniture; you know my family have awful taste, when I heard the crash. I went outside to yell at whoever it was. But then I saw her, and…there's something about her Mooney. I feel like I know her somehow, but it's not clicking into place. But anyway, there she was, stuck in the car and covered in blood. I got her out and brought her inside, but then she started freaking out. She went mad when I tried to clean the cut on her head and then ran out of the house. I didn't want her to hurt herself more and I knew Dumbledore could probably work it out better than me so I put her to sleep and took her straight to him." He paused, taking another large mouthful of the amber liquid. Remus doesn't move, sitting silently listening to the tale. "Dumbledore says she's not from this time; she has a time turner Remus, a real one, but it's broken. He said her memory is something to do with the broken time-tuner, she still thinks she's in third year at Hogwarts. Anyway, she started saying this stuff about me and… she said I betray them. Lily and James."

"What?"

Sirius downs the rest of his drink and drops the glass onto the table next to him. His voice is quiet and shaky when he finally speaks. "Yeah, it was horrible Remus. She knows me, whenever she's from. She said I killed 12 muggle's, and I betrayed Lily and James. She knows Harry too, she said I betray her best friend's parents, and without me they would still be alive."

"That can't be true. I know you too well; you wouldn't do anything to harm your friends." Remus pauses, thinking how best to frame his next question. "Dumbledore mentioned something about Peter. Something the girl mentioned, about not being able to trust him?"

"Yeah, I thought it was odd too. I mentioned changing the plan, making him secret keeper. I thought it would make sense as no one would think we'd give that much responsibility to him, but then Hermione started shouting about not being able to trust him. I mean, he's not the bravest person I know, but…" He thought back to Hermione's adamant plea not to trust Peter. Something in the urgency of her voice made him believe her. "We need to watch him closely. We're not changing the plan, it's still going to be me, but we need to keep an eye on him till this all blows over. Something isn't right."

"I'll do it, you need to stay here." Remus finishes his drink before returning to the green flames of the fire and disappearing as quickly as he had appeared.

Sirius pours himself one last glass of Fire Whiskey, returning the half full bottle and the photo album to the shelf. As he brings the glass up to his lips, a piercing scream fills the house and the glass drops from his hands, shattering on the floor as Sirius runs out of the room and up the stairs towards the front bedroom.

Upon entering the room he finds Hermione still screaming, crying her eyes out and fidgeting in her sleep.

* * *

_She paused, standing motionless at the back door, waiting for her heart to stop racing._

_The early morning sun was just starting to peek out from behind the clouds, and Hermione knew that if she didn't leave soon, Mrs Weasley would be awake to make breakfast, and not long after that everyone else would be awake. She had to leave now._

_Who knows what they would do if they saw Hermione right now, with all her things packed into the small car that had once belonged to her Father._

_A single tear made its way slowly down her face as she picked up the last of her bags from the kitchen table. She looked around slowly, trying to take it all in. The Burrow had been her home for the last 2 years, it was hard to leave but she knew she had to. There was simply no other way._

_Taking a deep breath, she turned towards the back door once again._

_Harry came slowly down the stairs, his feet shuffling against the floor. He rubbed his eyes before they settled on Hermione; a confused expression crossed his face. "Hermione?" He looked down and noticed the bag hanging loosely around her wrist. "You're leaving?"_

_Hermione swallowed back the tears that were trying to force their way out, and turned to look at her friend over her shoulder. "I have to."_

_"Don't be silly, of course you don't." He paused, waiting for her to say something. "Come sit down, we'll talk about it." He pulled out a chair for her to sit on, but Hermione didn't budge. "I know things are hard right now, but you can't just leave. Where will you go?"_

_"I don't know yet, I just know I have to get out." Her voice trembled._

_"Please stay…"_

_Hermione didn't want to, but suddenly all the anger and hurt she had been feeling over the past few months came spilling over. She turned to face him, tears streaming down her face. "I can't, Harry. I don't want to spend my whole life waiting here for something, which is never going to happen. I can't sit here and pretend that something is going to come along and change everything. Nothing can change what happened." She realised that she was shouting when she heard footsteps from above. Lowering her voice, she finished. "I'm sorry Harry. I love you, I love all of you; but I can't stay here anymore."_

_Finally she turned and stepped through the door, trying to forget the pain she felt when she saw the tears in Harry' eyes._

_"What's going on down here? Harry?" Mrs Weasley said as she entered the kitchen. She saw Harry frozen in place, staring out into the garden as Hermione got into the car, and drove quickly away._

_For one split second, as she saw the Weasley family all pour out of the door chasing after her, she almost turned around._

_But the missing members were a clear reminder of why it would hurt too much to stay._

* * *

A warm hand grips my shoulder as the last image of the dream starts to fade away. A voice is shouting my name. Is that still the dream? It can't be the dream, it's too loud. They sound worried, whoever they are.

Suddenly it hits me, who the voice is; Sirius. I gasp and my eyes pop open, my vision blurry as I look up into Sirius' face. He does indeed look worried, but why?

"Are you ok?" He asks, helping me to sit up as I try to remember what the dream was about, a horrible feeling settling in the pit of my stomach.

"I…I'm fine." I mutter quietly, my voice hoarse. I can feel that it's a lie, but I try not to let it show. "What happened?"

"You were crying, and screaming, and I couldn't wake you." He passes me a tissue, and its only them that I notice that my face is wet with tears.

As I wipe my face slowly, my jumbled thoughts bringing all sorts of different images and feelings to the front of my mind.

"Dumbledore said your memories would come back slowly, most likely in your sleep. Did it feel like a memory? Do you remember anything new?"

I close my eyes and try to think about the new information in my dream. It had felt strange, like something wasn't quite right. Harry did seem older and like my own reflection in Dumbledore's mirror, he had new scars covering his face rather than just the lightning bolt one. "I don't know. It could be, but…" Pain travels through me, a gut wrenching pain that makes me feel breathless. "I don't know." I finish on a whisper and turn away, hoping he will leave soon so I can think properly.

Sirius is silent for a moment, before he puts his hand gently over mine, resting on the bed beside me. "It's ok Hermione; it'll come back to you." He leaved the room, but quickly returns with two small bottles labelled 'Headaches' and 'Dreamless Sleep' "Here, these should help for now." He places the bottles on the bed beside me, gives my hand a gentle squeeze and then leaves the room.

As soon as the door closes I feel tears start to fall steadily down my face.

I had remembered something.

Ron was dead.

* * *

**Sooo, not much has changed in this chapter, just the addition of Remus and some plot changes mostly to do with the timeline :) like I said at the start of this chapter, I'll be getting onto the new stuff really soon.**


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